Blame it on the soy sauce.

I had one thought upon entering work yesterday:

Oh no.  This is NOT going to work.

I found my nemesis in a pair of turquoise skinny jeans.

For several years now I’ve owned these jeans and randomly wear them when the mood strikes, but yesterday…  Well, yesterday they turned on me.  My theory is that the soy sauce from the night before made my hips explode.  Throughout the day I proceeded to wriggle, tug and jump up and down to get these slithering thigh-haters back to a comfortable location on my body.  Where I began the day wondering if I’d ever be a grown up (see yesterday’s post), I ended the day with words like, “I am NEVER shopping in the Junior Department EVER again.”

Sure enough, when I got home those pants came off faster than a monkey could peel a banana.  …But not before I explained the situation to Brian.

Me, “Brian, I am NEVER wearing these jeans again.”

Brian, “Why not?”

Me, “Exhibit A.”  Then, with my back turned, I squatted down on the floor for a visual and Brian got to know the plumber side of me.

Brian, “OOOOOOHHH!  Did that happen to you at work today?!”

Me, already changing, “No.  I stood all day.  But still…  I think it was the soy sauce.”

Brian, “W.h.a.t.”

Me, “Yeah, when women eat salt, it makes them swell.”

Brian, “That ONE packet of soy sauce could not have made that big of a difference!  You didn’t change that much!”

Me, “It was two packets!”

Regardless.

Now where can I find turquoise skinny jeans for adults?

9 Comments

  1. January 13, 2012
    Katie

    “what is the junior department”…….too funny.
    That IS an awfully annoying feeling isn’t it! I love that you had to show Brian.

  2. January 13, 2012
    Momma

    LOL … I’ll trade bodies with you any day. :p

  3. January 13, 2012
    Heather

    at least you realized what was going on….just love when that happens to the girls at work…and they do NOTHING…the only thing I can get in the juniors dept…ok children’s dept… is shoes:)

  4. January 13, 2012
    Cindi

    Oh you poor thing!

  5. January 15, 2012
    Jessica

    I don’t think it was in the junior’s department, but I saw some turquoise jeans in Macy’s yesterday. I was never really able to wear the low rise jeans. Embrace the beautiful you 😀

  6. January 16, 2012
    Manny

    By the time you find another pair of skinny jeans that you like, they will have gone out of style. Jump ahead of the game quick and set a new trend!

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