Brian’s Interview.

Brian got wrangled by my coworkers into a secret video interview for the baby shower.  While at the shower, I was asked the same questions that he was.  Would you like to see Brian on video?

I thought so.

Here’s how he and I compared:

• Question 1) How many children would you and Suzanna like to have?

Brian: “Uh, I don’t know.  Four?”

Me: Here’s the thing: I won’t have this conversation with Brian right now.  I just want to get through the one pregnancy first and then we can talk numbers.  I know that Brian would definitely like more than one, so I said, “Two.”  But I could have told ya he would have upped the number.

• Question 2) What’s worse?  Messy diaper on your shirt or baby vomit on your shirt?

Brian: “Smelly diaper.”

Me: Oh, I knew FO’ SHO’ that Brian would say that.  He’s really anti-poop.  Not that I’m pro-poop, but the man gets the serious heebie-jeebies.

• Question 3) What trait of yours do you hope Bennett has?

Brian: “Uh…  I don’t know.  …uh…  I don’t know.  Maybe, like, a good heart maybe.”

Me: I wasn’t sure if we were leaning towards a character trait or a physical trait.  In terms of physical, I said that I’d like Bennett to have Brian’s square jawline and the little gap between his front teeth; in terms of character, Brian’s generosity.  But, yes, his good heart and his generous heart go hand in hand.

• Question 4) What trait of Suzanna do you hope Bennett has?

Brian: “Square Piece.”

Me: “I want him to love Jesus.”  (I’ll admit, it felt awkward saying that in front of a group of people, not knowing how uncomfortable my public faith might make them.  But the truth is the truth!)

• Question 5) What have you liked the most about Suzanna while she is pregnant?

Brian: “Her glowing face.”

Me: I said that I thought he’d say my appetite or something pertaining to my growing appreciation for salty, greasy and fatty foods.

• Question 6) If you had to give Bennett a nighttime feeding, which time would you choose?  12:30AM?  2:00AM?  3:15AM?

Brian: “12:30 AM.”

Me: I knew he’d say 12:30.  First of all, Brian’s usually still up around then.  Second of all, he sleeps like a grumpy, hibernating bear.  So, no, he wouldn’t prefer to get up in those wee hours.

• Question 7) Are coordinating family outfits acceptable for Christmas pictures?

Brian: “No.”  (Though the paper said, “Hell no.”)

Me: Don’t be fooled.  I can change his mind.  It’s all in how I present it.

• Question 8 ) Do you want Bennett to have your nose or Suzanna’s nose?

Brian: “Uh, Suzy’s.”

Me: I said he’d go for mine.

• Question 9) As a hands-on dad, what will you do the most to help out?

Brian: “Clean up the house and stuff.”

Me: I think they might have skipped asking me this question, but I couldn’t be happier with his answer!

• Question 10) When will Bennett be born and how much will he weigh?

Brian: “October 25th, 6 pounds.”

Me: I said Halloween, 7.1 pounds.  But if Bennett likes Brian’s answer better, that’s okay, too!