Dear Unsuspecting Gentleman at Coldstone Creamery,
Please forgive me for nearly giving you a heart attack. A little bit of guilt has lingered with me since I saw you clutch your hand to your heart in relief. But you have to understand that I’m really going to miss the opportunity to stress people out (particularly men) once I’m no longer pregnant.
Until recently, I had no idea that it is a practice among the male population to notice a baby bump and acknowledge it by saying, “Congratulations.” Once I picked up on this, I couldn’t resist having some fun with it.
So when you, too, chose to be so kind as to express congrats and I replied by squinting, cocking my head to the side, looking puzzled, ignoring the obvious and inquiring, “What do you mean?”, well, it was just an impulse.
Kudos to you for thinking quickly on your feet and blurting, “Nothing,” while immediately setting your gaze in the opposite direction. Seriously, well done.
But you’re right. I AM pregnant (as I laughingly expressed with all the hand gesturing of a half-Italian woman swatting the awkwardness away).
I do hope you’ll still offer congratulations to many expecting women to come.
…Especially when they’re standing in line for a milkshake.
Belly Progression shots here.
Blooper Belly Progression shots here.