Dear Vertigo…

Dear Vertigo,

My name is Suzanna.  My friends call my Suzy, my husband sometimes calls me Square Piece.  I hear that your friends call you Dizziness.

Now that we’ve made our acquaintance, I’m going to have to request that you keep a safe distance from me.  This little episode that you and I had this morning is an affair that I cannot maintain.

There’s not much that I can do to hide from you, Vertigo, so this is going to have to be a kindness on your part.  Sources say that if I avoid standing all day or eat regularly throughout the day that we won’t have to keep company.  My problem with this, Vertigo, is that you’ve already come along to say hello this morning and I haven’t even gotten to the part of my day where I’m supposed to stand for eight hours and probably won’t have much time to eat.

If you cannot comply with my simple request, I’m going to have to resort to more extreme measures than a polite letter, measures just shy of a restraining order.

I hear that there are boats full of travelers prepared to make your acquaintance.  Try heading out to sea, okay?

Holy XOXO’s,

Suzy**

 

5 Comments

  1. June 2, 2012
    Momma

    oh dear … I wondered if you would get this …. vertigo hounded me through all five of my pregnancies 🙁

  2. June 2, 2012
    Laura

    I say if you have clients that you feel comfortable around eat a granola bar or something quick as they are talking to you. Eat please! I don’t want to hear you fell on the floor. I only say this because sometimes I get so busy I forget to eat and more than once almost passed out in public!

  3. June 2, 2012
    Cindi Loretz

    Praying it takes the very polite hit and flits itself away from you!

  4. June 6, 2012
    adele bernard

    I hope you’re feeling better. I love the way you have worded your letter. Vertigo stay away from my friend!!!

  5. June 15, 2012
    Katie

    Eeeek, no fun! Man, you’re getting all kinds of prego symptoms! I’ll write Vertigo a letter too!!!!! I’ll try to be nice.

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