Flashy thing, please.

Do you think the staff at the pediatrician’s office compare notes on patients?  If so, Bennett’s chart probably comes with a warning about my incompetence.

We’ve had four appointments so far, this past Friday being the most recent.  Not once have we left there without incident.  I’d love to get in and out without being memorable, but no.  Bennett enjoys peeing before, during and/or after each weigh in.  (But he weighed 9.13 lbs!  That’s 2.1 lbs gained!)  Last time he soaked the pediatrician’s ENTIRE table.  The paper that lines it literally wicked his pee to all four corners.

Then there’s the fact that every time they’re watching, I bonk Bennett in the head getting him in or out of these awkward corners, angles and contraptions.  It doesn’t help that there’s nothing but hard surfaces to exaggerate how uncomfortable we both are.

And finally, before I can leave, naturally my son needs to be strapped back into his carseat.  I’m sure that everyone in the facility thinks that I’m securing him inside out and upside down for as much as he screams bloody murder.  Such a delight.

I need one of those Men In Black flashy things to erase everyone’s memories.  Yep, last year I wanted a spoon rest for Christmas.  This year?  Invisibility.


  1. December 2, 2012
    Joan Dedman

    Oh, Suzy, when I leave an awkward or lasting impression, I always say it just gives them something to talk about at lunch or dinner. No worries!

  2. December 2, 2012
    patricia hughes-fitzgerald

    my sister is a pediatrician, and i have never heard any of your type of stories from her. confederate flag t-shirts? yes. octupus tatoos in…ahem…interesting places on the mother? yes. crying and/or peeing babies? nope. rest assured, you are doing a great job!!

  3. December 2, 2012

    Puhleeeze! That is everyday fare at a pediatricians office!! Just wait til Bennett is old enough to embarrass you himself…oh yeah…now that will be memorable 😉

  4. December 2, 2012

    All that pee is a good sign that he is well hydrated. 🙂

    I’d like one of those MIB mind erasers, too. :p

    As for the invisibility, I think I’ve already got that one …. or so it would seem.

  5. December 2, 2012

    Oh just laugh at it and say that your going for the world record of how many times a baby can pee during a checkup. It happends to every mommy. Cut yourself some slack your still getting the hang of it all. And rest assure once you get the hang of this stage a next one will come. Mine is the 2’s stage Yippy I hear it’s a challenging one!

  6. December 2, 2012

    Skylar was Always peeing on the table. It happens. At least your not getting the wetness :). Your doing great Iam sure.

  7. December 2, 2012

    When my 6 year old (youngest son) went through a multi-factor evaluation to determine why he was not reading after 2 years in 1st grade (and I worked with him for hours each day trying to teach him to read), When we got the psych report back I read it and was mortified! He told the Psycholgist in response to her question “What is special about your mom”? he said “She doesn’t hit me as hard as my Dad”!!!!!

  8. Just say “NO” to memory eraser thingies. It’ll happen soon enough to all of us and I’m starting to lose some of the ones that I’d like to keep!! Good thing I kept a journal of all that cute stuff my boys said and did =)

  9. December 3, 2012

    I think they understand, at least I hope so. Every time I went, my baby screamed like she was being bite by a rat…or starving to death. Even though I always feed her *right* before leaving home…! I think infants just know when they are going to the drs

  10. December 3, 2012

    Ha! That’s awesome. I wish i had one of those thingys too. For sure.

  11. December 3, 2012

    Bring a towel and slip it under Bennett on the table. Explain, you have motherly experience and this is more absorbent than their paper.

    Otherwise, laugh with them, which I imagine they
    are doing!

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