Mentally: It’s sweet the amount of attention one gets when she’s pregnant. These days I’m getting a lot of, “So how are yOoOoOouuuu…?” When answering that question, I try to remember that it could always be worse. Am I tired? Yes. But I could be (and have been) more tired, so I can’t complain. Do I taste aluminum foil in my mouth? Yes. But I’m not running to the bathroom to throw up, so I can’t complain.
All in all, in the mental realm of pregnancy, I’m trying to stay positive, stay thankful and pay attention.
Emotionally: Waiting, waiting, waiting. Oh, how I want to know the gender! I’m just aching for this… kinda in the way I’d ache for a white Christmas or no red lights when I’m in a hurry. You know when you’re begging in your head? My heart feels that pleading, “Hurry, hurry, hurry…” Except, it’s all ache, no words. I just wanna know him or her! The mystery of who this baby is – not just gender – but WHO this baby is is something that I can hardly stop wondering about.
The other night I awoke from a dream in which I (somehow… kinda like I was two bodies) helped to deliver my own little girl with sweet doe eyes. When I fell asleep again, I began another dream in which I was carrying a boy.
Either way, I do love those dreams and am starting to realize how wonderful it will be to have my very own little person, hand-picked and designed by God for us, for Him. I wonder what He has in store!
Physically: My bladder of steel has betrayed me. I suspect that it will continue to do so. If we haven’t already discussed this on Square Piece, some people are proud of their blue eyes or their long legs or their pretty toes. Yeah? Well, I’m proud of my bladder.
When I was in the Amazon back in ’99, our entire team of 35+ people used one facility for our bathroom breaks. That facility was one hole that we dug in the ground. (Skip to ‘Spiritually‘ if you’re eating right now.) Young Square Piece was so heebie-jeebied by the squirming maggots at the bottom of this hole, that she would literally go to the bathroom once, every other day.
I understand that this is probably terrible for your health as a longterm lifestyle. But it was only two weeks… And you didn’t see the bugs down there! EWWWWWWWW! Not only that, but it’s quite unsettling to have your naked tushy suspended over a hole when there are also interesting Amazon bugs flying around above ground. As far as I was concerned, the less skin I exposed, the better.
Additionally, I’m a hairstylist. We never pee. At least, we don’t pee for long stretches of time when we’re very busy and can’t stand the thought an impatient client sighing, rolling her eyes or tapping her feet at our tardiness. Even if it’s a five-minute-bathroom-break sort of tardiness, it doesn’t matter ’cause she’ll think we’re “running behind.” Honestly, those five minutes can have a domino effect into the entire schedule, so I’m guilty of needing to pee and just deciding it’s not worth it for now.
All this to say: When the heck did I need to pee three times in one night? How can this bladder of steel not make it through one night and grant me seven glorious hours of sleep?!
You know, everyone says pregnant women have a glow. I say it’s all the water we’re drinking.
Spiritually: *groan* I’m so distracted these days! (Hmm, wonder why?) Sitting down to read my Bible and pray is a real discipline. Sometimes when I pray, I end up falling asleep mid-prayer. So when people ask me to pray for them, I’m trying to do that on the spot so that I don’t forget.
Presently, since having finished reading the account of Christ’s crucifixion in Matthew, I’ve moved on to slowly reading Mark. A good slow read gives me time to really chew on the details.
For instance, when Jesus cast the “Legion” of demons out of a man possessed and living among the tombs, the demons begged to be sent into a herd of pigs. Those possessed pigs rushed down a steep bank, drowning themselves in the sea. I never realized that the passage explicitly counted 2,000 pigs. Two thousand! Can you imagine what that would look like on the news today? Two thousand pigs just bobbing in the sea?!
Even greater still, imagine the formerly demon possessed man who used to live with that magnitude of torment in his mind and body. What frightening freedom he must have felt that day when his mind was clear and his body would listen to him. What kindness of Christ to not be afraid of such a man, but to see the real soul inside of him and deliver him!
Have a wonderful, free-in-Christ kind of weekend!