Never give Brian too much anesthesia.
The man can’t handle it.
But if you do, make sure that I’m around when he wakes up. However I’ll need enough notice so that I can bring a drink, some popcorn and a video camera to what I am sure will become the “Friendly Pageant.”
It’s always a show when Brian’s not 100% in his right mind. This comes as no surprise being that my everyday Brian is the lead character in my life’s sitcom, Square Piece. The difference is that when he’s in an influenced state of mind, our life goes from being a comedy to a romantic comedy.
I’ll never forget seeing him wake up from anesthesia.
Brian, eyes half open and smiling at the nurse, “Thaaaaaank you… Looooooove you.”
Nurse looks at me, “He’s a cheap date.”
You see, you have to take Brian’s size into account. If you’re familiar with The Jeans Incident, you already know that his waist is as small as mine. Couple that with the fact that he’s also two inches shorter than me and you’ll begin to understand that where most men can drink one beer and not be affected, Brian could probably sniff a beer and start feeling a little dazed.
So let’s just say that once upon a time Brian had “sniffed” a cold one. Seeing as his face was fixed in that comfy, contented smile, I saw the perfect opportunity to ask our favorite question:
Me, “Brian, do you love me?”
Me, “Why do you love me?”
Brian, using plain logic, ” ‘Cuz I’m your… …huzzzzzzzzbinnnnn.”
This moment was not lost on me. Many years later, I still tag this to the end of the most basic requests and reminders.
“Brian, would you mind bringing me a cup of coffee with milk and cool whip but no agave… ‘cuz you’re my huzzzzbinnn?”
(Psst! Happy birthday, Brian! I’m so blessed that you’re my huzzzzbinnnn!)