Have you ever had to ask a second party to make sure that you wake up? Perhaps you’ve doubted the reliability of an alarm clock when a pressing engagement was the following morning? Brian and I are forever asking each other to be sure that one of us gets up. We both have the ability to sleep through three alarm clocks, the early morning Roomba, the whining basset hounds and the trash truck. It’s simply incredible how much our sleepy selves do not resemble our waking selves.
Sometimes Brian and I set alarms that we know are just snooze-worthy alarms. You know? The ones that are just meant to get you stirring until you’re four snooze buttons in and it’s finally going off at the right hour?
When Brian’s conscious, the man would never, EVER make a move to threaten me or to hurt me. I’ve grown to really value his tenderness toward me. Every married woman should have such a self-controlled, patient and loving husband!
Yet, when Brian’s unconscious, anything could happen. In fact more than being groggy, before meeting my husband, I had never met anyone who was more dangerous in his sleep than during his waking hours.
There once was an evening in which I requested that Brian be sure I wake up by six A.M. the following morning. Who knows why I was so urgent at the time? But for whatever reason, it was clear that the world would stop revolving if I didn’t get moving by that hour.
That morning the alarm went off as usual and Brian bolted up with his outstretched arm, ready to smack the snooze button. (What a marvel that our bodies can be so conditioned to a routine that physical instincts take over like that!) The only problem was the Brian was not facing the alarm clock. He was facing me.
BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!
He looked me square in the eyes. That outstretched arm did the only thing it knew to do at the hour in the morning and smacked me right on top of my head… as if I WAS the snooze button.
Brian, sounding confused, “?…What?…!”
Yes, I suppose he did what I asked him. He definitely succeeded in waking me up that morning.