Marcus humiliated me at the gym today. And I let him. That’s what I’ve paid for, right?
You have GOT to see this in your mind. I’ll walk you through it.
First, let’s start with the basic squat.
Picture yourself doing a typical squat. Up, down, up, down, up, down… Except, you need to widen your legs. Think sumo wrestler. You’re doing sumo squats. Up, down, up, down, up, down. Except, something changes on the up. Instead of just coming back up, you’re actually coming up on only one of your sumo legs. The other leg is hiking straight out to the side. A high, side kick, if you will.
Sumo squat down, sumo stand up on the right leg with the left leg flailing to the left; sumo squat down, sumo stand up on the left leg with the right leg flailing to the right, etc. Continue alternating back and forth.
But your not done. I mean, come on… What are you doing with your hands? Got them on your waist, do you? Not quite.
No, it’s more like this lady:
While your legs are acting like flailing scissors during your wide sumo squats, your arms are extended eye level in front of you. They don’t last long in that position, though, because you’re holding a 10lb. kettle bell that swings low between your legs when you squat. And when you come back up from the squat (with your jazzy side leg kicks in motion), you’ve got to swing the weight high to eye level again.
So to be clear: limbs are swinging in all directions unless you’re in a low, wide squat like a sumo wrestler.
We were standing on the path in the MIDDLE of the facility with foot traffic all around us. Yes. And when I saw Marcus’ demonstration (which can only be described as looking twinkle-toed and thumpy), all I could utter was, “No. That looks ridiculous.”
Marcus knows that I’m up for just about any physical challenge. But the mental challenge of handing over my pride and dignity is much harder than any exercise. (This was even worse than having to run in slow motion. Remember?)
I stepped into position and I let out a long sigh.
Knowing just how stupid this whole routine looked, I simply looked at Marcus and said, “Just stand a little closer so I can kick you.”