If all goes well, Brian and I will be starting a family some time around October 30th.
What a relief to finally get this news off of my chest!
Just so ya know, we found out on March 2nd. I’ve been hoarding blogs about feelings, emotional and physical, that I intend to release here and there. It is my joy and my intention to be utterly and shamelessly honest about this entire experience.
At first, I was worried that my readers would be like, “Uh oh, this is going to turn into a baby blog. Booooooooring.” But yesterday, after receiving more comments than any other post has ever gotten, I feel a little better about this “new category.”
Here’s the deal: Our baby was a surprise. (On some level, anyhow. We all know that Brian thinks I’m pregnant all the time. He just happened to be right during the Fishbowl Bra Incident.)
What that deal means: I panicked. This news of blessing took a little while to sink in.
So before I begin sharing the ins and outs of this journey, let me start off by making sure that you understand that Brian and I are very excited about the Lord’s timing in this. As I know from my Knitting Tattoo lesson, God is forming this baby with love, design, personality and purposes for His glory and goodness. We rejoice in this!
It might also tickle you to think back to various posts from the last month, before and after March 2nd, the morning I “peed on the stick.” For instance, an entire week after I had finished the Roman Shades, I was still completely drained and exhausted. While my body knew that I had been pregnant since February 5th, my brain chalked it up to my obsessive over-exersion catching up with me.
And when I was all clingy and emotional about wanting Brian to be Willing To Stay, even if he left for the night? Hormones.
And why I didn’t expound more on our Hair Trip to Chicago? Ummm, being that I had to leave for this show the day after I found out that I was pregnant, Chicago was the last thing on my mind. It’s kind of a blur actually. During that trip, every two minutes, another realization of what this change means for us would whack me from behind and I’d walk around with tears in my eyes… AGAIN.
While you may think that I began posting about our pregnancy yesterday, I really began blogging about it with Celebrate the Unknown. (That entire post makes more sense in context; trust me.) Rejoicing in hope has made all the difference.
Honestly, today I am nine weeks and two days pregnant. Popular opinion is to wait until the first trimester is over to begin sharing. Yeah, I get that. Anything could happen. And that’s exactly why we’re telling now. Friends, I covet your prayers! Anything could happen! I trust that the Lord has plans for good, regardless. But considering the fact that neither Brian nor I have ever walked through these major changes before now, we don’t want to do this in secret. On the contrary, even if there are more unexpected surprises in store, we want to do this with transparent hearts before the Lord, knowing that our friends are lifting us up in prayer, pleading and petitioning on our behalf.
…And I’m terrible at pretending anyway.
So be warned: This could be messy, this could be inspiring, this could be hilarious.
But what this won’t be? This won’t be some holier-than-thou Christian droning on and on about the diluted righteousness she thinks she possesses and the soapbox on which she declares pregnancy perfection.
Every now and then I get fears. There were a lot more three weeks ago than there are now. My prayer is that for every fear and every lie that gets whispered in my ear, the Lord would arm me with four more Truths to declare in His name that I might continue to trust Him, rather than freak out about allllllllllllll the “what ifs.”