Trust your gut, Part 2.

So, yeahhhh…

If all goes well, Brian and I will be starting a family some time around October 30th.

What a relief to finally get this news off of my chest!

Just so ya know, we found out on March 2nd.  I’ve been hoarding blogs about feelings, emotional and physical, that I intend to release here and there.  It is my joy and my intention to be utterly and shamelessly honest about this entire experience.

At first, I was worried that my readers would be like, “Uh oh, this is going to turn into a baby blog.  Booooooooring.”  But yesterday, after receiving more comments than any other post has ever gotten, I feel a little better about this “new category.”

Here’s the deal: Our baby was a surprise.  (On some level, anyhow.  We all know that Brian thinks I’m pregnant all the time.  He just happened to be right during the Fishbowl Bra Incident.)

What that deal means: I panicked.  This news of blessing took a little while to sink in.

So before I begin sharing the ins and outs of this journey, let me start off by making sure that you understand that Brian and I are very excited about the Lord’s timing in this.  As I know from my Knitting Tattoo lesson, God is forming this baby with love, design, personality and purposes for His glory and goodness.  We rejoice in this!

It might also tickle you to think back to various posts from the last month, before and after March 2nd, the morning I “peed on the stick.”  For instance, an entire week after I had finished the Roman Shades, I was still completely drained and exhausted.  While my body knew that I had been pregnant since February 5th, my brain chalked it up to my obsessive over-exersion catching up with me.

And when I was all clingy and emotional about wanting Brian to be Willing To Stay, even if he left for the night?  Hormones.

And why I didn’t expound more on our Hair Trip to Chicago?  Ummm, being that I had to leave for this show the day after I found out that I was pregnant, Chicago was the last thing on my mind.  It’s kind of a blur actually.  During that trip, every two minutes, another realization of what this change means for us would whack me from behind and I’d walk around with tears in my eyes… AGAIN.

While you may think that I began posting about our pregnancy yesterday, I really began blogging about it with Celebrate the Unknown.  (That entire post makes more sense in context; trust me.)  Rejoicing in hope has made all the difference.

Honestly, today I am nine weeks and two days pregnant.  Popular opinion is to wait until the first trimester is over to begin sharing.  Yeah, I get that.  Anything could happen.  And that’s exactly why we’re telling now.  Friends, I covet your prayers!  Anything could happen!  I trust that the Lord has plans for good, regardless.  But considering the fact that neither Brian nor I have ever walked through these major changes before now, we don’t want to do this in secret.  On the contrary, even if there are more unexpected surprises in store, we want to do this with transparent hearts before the Lord, knowing that our friends are lifting us up in prayer, pleading and petitioning on our behalf.

…And I’m terrible at pretending anyway.

So be warned: This could be messy, this could be inspiring, this could be hilarious.

But what this won’t be?  This won’t be some holier-than-thou Christian droning on and on about the diluted righteousness she thinks she possesses and the soapbox on which she declares pregnancy perfection.

Every now and then I get fears.  There were a lot more three weeks ago than there are now.  My prayer is that for every fear and every lie that gets whispered in my ear, the Lord would arm me with four more Truths to declare in His name that I might continue to trust Him, rather than freak out about allllllllllllll the “what ifs.”


  1. March 27, 2012

    Yay!!! Congratulations to you both! 🙂

  2. March 27, 2012
    erin mcdonald

    NOt only will this get messy and funny it is going to be GREAT!! YOu are going to bring a whole new meaning to blogging momma! And I can’t wait!
    Justin and I totally told every one the day after we found out. We lost our first and we were so glad to have everyone there to love and support us! And when numero dos came along we shouted from the roof tops again right away! Beause like you said I can’t pretend and God is good and this is a wonderful gift from Him I have to tell EVERYONE!!! Again so excited for you and looking forward to reading all about it! SMOOCH!

  3. March 27, 2012

    although I wish I could have known about it sooner I am so glad you waited until we were face to face, so I could hug you and cry in your ear

    love you so much …. the prayers were already there

  4. March 27, 2012

    Oh Suzy……..this little baby…… to have you as “mommy”!!!!!!!!!! I’m filled with joy for you guys every time I think about the fact you’re having a baby. I’m praying for the three of you daily. Gods hand in your lives is beautiful, evident, steady and strong.

  5. March 27, 2012

    Just continue to be real. That is the best. We’ll all enjoy walking the journey with you, even if from afar. 🙂 Congrats again!

  6. March 27, 2012
    Christina Wood

    Congratulations! I understand what you are going through…both my first baby and this second one that is on the way were suprises. I was super excited for Samara, but this second one has been a mixture of emotions! Praying for safety and health for you and baby!

  7. March 27, 2012
    Abbie Lycans

    I anticipate your future blogs with much eagerness, there’s a big need for great writers who can share an experience like pregnancy, without making other pregnant women feel guilty about what they’re doing or not doing right; and instead gracing us with storytelling that inspires, and amazes us; makes us laugh and cry; makes us think about life with less cynicism, while at the same time embracing the reality of all of it: from the most beautiful to the appalling mess of it all. that’s my experience so far with pregnancy: amazingly beautiful beyond description and one second later just plain gross and unbearable, and then one second later maybe both at the same time, somehow…you’ll figure out a different way to describe it and i can’t wait to hear about it all.

  8. March 27, 2012
    Becca shaw

    Yeah!!! Sooooo exciting. You are going to be a wonderful mommy 🙂

  9. March 27, 2012

    Prayers will always go up from me…to calm your fears, to help with swelling feet, hemorroids, cravings and craziness that all comes with carrying a blessing in our body. I remember being pregnant with your cousin, and while Uncle Van and I were never blessed with children together, we now get to see a whole new generation come to pass. We are so blessed to have you as a niece and brian as a nephew…no such thing as a nephew in law…nephew is nephew, and love is love.

  10. March 27, 2012

    When we got surprise pregnant last year it was the same thing. I started writing a journal to Amelie because I needed to vent my anxiety but remember her life was precious. I never wanted her to look back and think I didn’t want her so I kept a journal by my night stand where I was honest with her but forced myself to dream about the great things family brings. As I began to feel her kick around week 15 my perspective changed and I was filled with more hope and excitement. That is my prayer for you my sweet friend. THank you for the desire to be transparent and letting us in on your life so we can pray for you in specific ways! I love you!

  11. March 27, 2012
    Aubrey Heki

    Oh my goodness! Blog away about this little one, Suzy! I am so excited for you!

  12. March 27, 2012

    I love your honesty and I’m looking forward to reading and hearing about this journey with you

  13. March 27, 2012
    Margaret Treadwell

    as long as you remember to smile and nod when some women go on and on about their pregnancies… about how amazing/sick/awful/ dangerous/humorous THEIR pregnancy was and how yours couldn’t possibly equate, you’ll be fine!

  14. March 27, 2012

    You don’t have to worry about hearing pregnancy stories and myths from me. Never done that, so I’m looking forward to hearing about your journey and blessing!!!!

  15. March 28, 2012
    Adele Bernard

    I love this post and everytime I think of you and I say a prayer for you I get tears of joy in my eyes. I love ya girl!!!

  16. March 28, 2012

    It is wonderful to be part of this joyous experience. My granddaughter was born 12 years ago and I haven’t closely shared a pregnancy since. I know God will be with you every step of the way. His love will be as transparent as yours is in this blog. Bask in the miracles of the last several weeks and fear not the future, my dear. Planning ahead in this situation is almost impossible, as I’m sure you will discover. You will be faced with new challenges and surmount them with ease. Your honesty, creativity and gentle, caring spirit will triumph!

  17. March 29, 2012
    Adele Bernard

    Ok…I just read this for the second time and I still have tears of joy. I guess this means I am really excited for you and me. This means I have a new baby to start spoiling! 🙂

  18. April 5, 2012

    So excited & happy for you & Brian! Great times lie ahead! I look forward to joining you in the journey-via the blog.

  19. November 3, 2012

    I just got chills reading this one. Love it!

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